OK – to put you out of your misery … how to sit on the sidewalk and not get yr bum or feet dirty. You remove ONE flipflop, which is what you will sit on. You keep the other on the spare foot and sit back, with yr legs crossed at the ankles, with the flip-flopless one in the air. Go on, give it a try. The guy I saw doing this was ancient too. I would love to see just how he lined up bum with the flipflop and on one foot too. HOW do you sit down on something that is half an inch off the ground ?
Tet is over, so this means the return of the rent-a-tree, which is huge business. Those of you with good memories will remember last year, when I was here pre-Tet, I was happily engaged watching the park-full of flowering trees being debated over. Think Christmas tree, except this tree is really living in a huge pot and is a sort of bonsoi-on-steroids. All manicured to perfect shape and ready to burst forth in bright yellow blossom at just the right time. I shall have to ask Huy how they do it, as I doubt if they have acres of climate controlled greenhouses to hold them back until the optimum moment. Well now they are all going home, so there are the scooters with the trees on the back, now flower and leaf-less being returned and I expect you get a deposit back.
At the Café Nhi we have valet parking too. You just abandon your bike any old place outside right on the street and the man in the yellow café t-shirt then moves it to a neat line. Perish the thought that you can have just put it there yourself. Also they are perpetually sweeping up and that includes the sidewalk, so they use a fan shaped soft brush for inside and then outside you get the big bundle of twigs. It’s kind of like the Korean hotel where they provide plastic sandals just inside the room door and of course facing the right way and then inside the bathroom there is yet another pair, just to wear there. I am all in favor of abandoning street shoes at the door and do so at home but the 2nd pair does seem a little OTT.
Old ladies still sport the traditional conical hat and also the baggy pyjama suit. Cool and comfortable for when things get sticky. And for those of you who remember my immediate locale, the coffin shop did have two empty spaces for full sized adults when I arrived, but next day they had been filed in with a couple of monster boxes which looked like it would take several people to lift. The owner was still stretched out on his lounger, looking dead to the world.
I have re-established frequent buyer status with the women at the bakery a few doors from my abode. They appear to be open all hours and the business is brisk. I can pop along in the morning for fresh ultra crispy rolls – there is a huge basket of them and u just pick what you want and they proffer the plastic bag. 10 US cents for a mini baguette. They will always make the traditional banh mi, which I can just live on. The woman who is there in the evenings, who is all smiles, knows that I can take the slices of hot pepper (and they are HOT, be clear about that) and I saw that you can buy slabs of crisply roasted pork too, which I may do some dumb show that I would like just a crispy pork sandwich, with the ‘special sauce’ that goes on everything. If that derails I can always just buy it all separately and assemble at home. That’s the good thing about an airbandb accommodation is that you have a kitchen so I can get creative. Just a one burner deal and a water jug heater and lots of equipment so that is all you need. And a good big fridge and freezer.
I went to the supermarket to find a few things. Looked like there was some kind of promo going on as a huge amount of bulk buying happening…. that or all the small hotels/guesthouses had decided to go on a mass toilet paper buying spree. You can find everything you need, even if it takes a bit of searching for. I needed salt and the more I looked, all I could find was monosodium glutamate, which is still much used here, esp as a dip for fruit. A little bit of dumb show with a miniscule girl and she got it and showed me where. Same happy looking and plump check out girl as the first day and I got a nice “Thang You’.
From a menu outside a restaurant: “Chopped Beef Fried Wine Burning” …. sounds great. I have also seen “Pork Rids with Nodles/Bones” and “Clay Pot Frog Porridge”.
A woman almost bouncing down the street with two huge baskets of fruit balanced on a piece of split bamboo across her shoulders. Each must have been heavier that I could pick up, but once she gets in to her stride there would be no stopping her. No padding on her shoulders either. Made me wince.
And the projected subway system is still nowhere near finished. Huge chunks of land shut off behind hoardings. Huy says projected date now something like 2020 and he Is not holding his breath. I told him not to give up hope as in NY we have recently had a new piece of subway line opened and that took lobbying for about 50 years and 10 years of work. I can just see the locals here wanting to take their bikes on the trains and there will be a move for impromptu dining on platforms for sure.
I spend more time in Huy’s office, proof-reading brochures. I get there by taxi, as he has moved too far away for walking. Taxis are many and cheap and beautifully air-conditioned. I have my address and his written down and only have to show it to the driver. Don’t even think of trying to pronounce anything, as you will derail for sure. Drivers are all male, well dressed with neatly ironed short-sleeved white shirts and practically the only persons you see wearing ties.
I go out for lunch with some staff and with his manager lady, Tracy, who he freely admits runs the place and who speaks excellent English. She is mid-30’s, pretty and certainly on top of everything. The food looks better than it tastes.
And now I am off to the former French hill-station of Dalat. At 4,500ft above sea-level, it will be a lot cooler and fresher than swampy Saigon. The inestimable Mr Hai come to collect me and we pick up Huy en route. He has several boxes to take up there to the Ananda Retreat, but first we had to stop for food and then we stop at the check in counter where a boy who did not look old enough to be employed, checked them in. Huy declared he needed coffee, so even through the flight was only 50 mins away and the security lines are never short, we still had to go back outside the terminal and visit the Starbucks for his express espresso. Then back upstairs in the terminal, where there was a good conga line and my passport was checked and I set off the bells on the security arch, so the girls there ran her hands up and down me, front and back. They would think men doing men and women doing women as vaguely perverted ! And then the flight was announced for 30 mins delayed. I find a timetable and quiz Huy as to how many flights a day are there on VN Airlines and it’s cheaper offshoot, Jetstar Asia, between Saigon and Hanoi. He guesses 20 – it’s 34 ! And at least half of them on huge fat planes.
So we board our A321, which is about 2/3 full for the all of 35 mins flight. It’s that or a 7 hour road trip, which is how I shall return. Captain Speaking is an Oz. We take off and land in quick succession and boy, it is Fresh ! A taxi is taken and all our many pieces fitted in and it is a 35 min drive to the meditation and yoga retreat that I am being allowed to visit. Huy is much carried away with all this and feels I should see it all, so I already said that two nights would be plenty (it’s usually a three day package for foreign devils) so I am booked for one night in a small hotel in town, which is somewhere over there but not visible. It’s all hills here.
And how I made out will be the start of the next epistle.
Tim
timothyvalentinestravels 
I love reading about your travels. The photos are wonderful. ❤
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